Entering the bedroom, I knew something was wrong: there was a naked baby peeing on the bed, a put-upon wife sobbing on the sheets. I extended my hand; she took it willingly, looked at me with blazing eyes.
“She is blazing.” I touched our child’s head. It was true. The forehead was hotter than my wife’s eyes. I reflected on earlier times, better days when I could sleep. I also recalled the times during which my wife would slumber. I remembered the nights, those glorious nights, when it was peaceful, when our little offspring, snug in her bed, would pass the night without expelling a single slug-like loogie. The poor dear—I looked at her now, her brow fevered, her baby voice husky, and she spoke to me:
“I will never sleep again.”
And we believed. God help us, we believed.
That’s why I haven’t been blogging. Happy holidays, everyone. Higher quality content coming soonish.